I walked out on my band...

Tom Quinn · Posted 28 Mar 2009 9:28 pm

I hated to do it. I love to play pedal steel. The first two gigs were pretty good -- not great but pretty good. Good drummer and solid bass player (I'd play with those two any time), a so-so rhythm guitar player who runs the band, a lead player who can't really play but has good energy.

And the mandolin player...
This bozo has made my life miserable because he cannot play, just makes urdle-urdle-urdle strumming noises; he's a stoner slob who is always looking for advice on his love life. and he constantly tweaked me about being 63. He's 54.

We played this gig Thursday night and he started giving me this Flo Max rap about if I'm gonna be in the john all night in front of the guests. I'm in better shape than him, am a much more youthful dude than he is and can play my axe. So I packed up at the end of the night, and left. I blew off the gig tonight, oh well.

I haven't play in a bar band for 25 years, except for my R&B unit in Tokyo. I forgot how many idiots own instruments.

Have you ever walked?

Bill Dobkins · From: Rolla Missouri, USA

Yes, yes and yes......I had a killer R&B band several years ago. One nite I caught the Drummer and Slide guitar player snortin Coke on the hood of a car. I took my sound equipment, axe and amp and went home. I didn't play again for 10 years. I was disgusted with bars,music and everything that went with it. Thanks to the steel guitar I have found a new love of music.
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Les Anderson · From: The Great White North

In fifty years of playing with bands, I have to say that I have walked only twice because of questionable musicians. Both times however, I did not walk out cold and leave the band in a lurch.

The third time was because I was not into the drug scene to keep me going and the other was because the band moved into a different style of music.

Flowmax?????????????, Hell, I take it and so does 60% of the male population over 55: or at least they are prescribed similar medication.

On the other hand though, I didn't need glasses until I was 59.

Jeff Hyman · From: West Virginia, USA

I'd probably be a bit more confrontational. Nice and polite first round. Second time around not. Walking away from a situation like this has the ability to make one loose some self confidence. Just my thoughts.

Tommy Shown · From: Denham Springs, La.

I can relate to that,that's why I am pretty particular about the people I play music with. I turned down a chance to play for this one guy, who was wanting me to work with him. We met doing open mic, the man had alot of talent as both a singer and a song writer. But he just couldn't leave the drugs alone. One night doing open mic he was on stage stoned out of his mind, that he and his wife started arguing. She was singing backup vocals with him.
If the cops raided the place and caught him,I would've gone downtown with him. I mean, I drink but not when I play. The only thing I when I play is Co-cola or if they got a coffee pot, the sweet nectar that is razed by ol'Juan Valdez in the mountains of Colombia.(coffee) If you know what I mean.
Tommy

Mike Perlowin · From: Los Angeles CA

in 1982, I was playing at a club, and during the break I went over to the bar to get a coke, where the clubowner/bartender was telling a patron how much he admired Adolph Hitler. I asked "What about the 6 million Jews he murdered?" The guy answered by showing me his gun and saying that if a Jew walked into his bar, he'd shoot him himself.

Under the circumstances, I felt it was better not to mention that I'm Jewish. I went back to the bandstand, finished out the night, packed up my gear and left as soon as possible, telling the band leader I was not coming back the next night and he had to find somebody else.

I don't think the guy would have actually shot me, but I do think I would have been beaten up and my instruments destroyed.
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CrowBear Schmitt · From: Ariege, - PairO'knees, - France

Tom, these situations happen to the best of us
they do serve a purpose
Life's too short to put up w: the you know what...
in due time you'll surely come upon some better guys

the only band i walked on 'em was while packin' up the gear w: one the guys,
while the others we're drinkin' at the bar
i went over & asked them if they'd help pack up
to which, the often out of tune & loud guitbox player, replied :
"when one comes into a band, one learns humility !"
to which: " in that case, you better pack your gear yourself cause i'm outta here "

Tony Prior · From: Charlotte NC

No, never walked out but have finished commitments and not taken anymore gigs. I guess I would have handled this a bit different but we are all different so who's to say what is correct.

I never discuss politics or religion very much outside of our home and certainly never on a gig. MP mentiones above that he went to the bar to get a coke, he entered the bartenders domain. They were talkin' trash , that's what they do at bars, MP joined the trash talk. As soon as that happens it's all downhill anyway regardless of the subject. I've seen near death arguments at bars over TV shows !

Like many here, I have been on the bandstand for 4 decades , all sorts of various issues, situations, bars, owners, girlfriends , wives, booze, drugs, politics, religion, ego's, attitudes, great players, bad players , wannabe players, etc..make a list,check it twice. Playing in the clubs may or may not be for everyone, it does indeed require a new skin and to survive it you need to somehow get past all of the BS and concentrate on the fun factor, hang with the band mates that you enjoy, ignore ( but be nice ) the ones you don't enjoy and blow off all of the stuff in between because at the end of the day it's just a band gig, we are not solving any of the worlds problems , in fact we may be causing some new ones with the music we play !

Thinking about the Mando guy here is what I eventually would have done on stage, and I have done this with some like him. When it was my time (turn) to solo, either on guitar or steel, I looked over at the goofs like him and said," Take it " of course they couldn't and made total fools of themselves. One time on a break after I did that to a real obnoxious guitar player ( owner not player ) attempted to howl at me at the table in front of everyone, and I just commented back " I had no idea you couldn't play ". He pretty much stopped talking right there on the spot. Problem solved. People like this guy mentioned above know there place musically and will seek another "place" within a band, something other than music. Another little trick you can do is play so soft that the rest of the band only hears him and then they become instantly aware of just how insignificant or obnoxious he is as a player in a unit.

I doubt I would join a band with a rhythm player and a non pickin' Mando player anyway, way too much going on for my taste.

just my take

t

David Nugent · From: Gum Spring, Va.

I had basically the same thoughts as Tony. Why was this person even in the group? Even if he was a competent player, unless he was an outstanding vocalist or could double on other instruments, the rhythm guitar plus mandolin seem to be overkill IMHO.

Rick Winfield · From: Pickin' beneath the Palmettos

I've worked with a drummer who was excellent, but...he constantly criticized the keyboard man and myself about everything, even though we had it under control, and did a good job. He would get loud and abusive on stage ! Even though I kept my mouth shut, not wanting to air the bands "dirty laundry" in public, he always left me enraged ! Finally, on day, I quit, and told them why. After the gig.
I did, however give them 2 weeks notice, not wanting to "taint" my reputation, by leaving them "high & dry".
After about 5 gigs, they managed to find a replacement, and I was relieved to get away.
I was "picked up" shortly, by others, and never looked back
Rick

Charles Curtis · Posted 29 Mar 2009 5:34 am

Mike, I wonder how many times that guy received benefits from Jewish doctors or scientists in our great country? Or if he goes to a Christian Church where the final benediction is the same as in a Synagogue? Winston Churchill would not even mention his name; he was so evil. I played in a club in Riverside, Ca one night and a biker club came in and the other patrons left. I found out that most of them lived a couple of blocks away; I never went back. IMO, booze and drugs can bring out the worst behaviour in some people. Life is too short folks.

Dave Ristrim · From: Whites Creek, TN

Working in bars can build character, and/or grind you into dust. Most of the time it just depends on how much you're willing to put up with.
I got to a point, while living in CA, that I was not happy playing in most clubs. I thought about quitting, but decided to just have a little fun no matter what happened. I started taking gigs I would normally turn down as a test. It worked for the most part. I could go, play steel and find some kind of redeeming quality for doing the gig. Sometimes, I would use the night to practice new licks, and just tune out the bad parts of the night.
I will say I'm happy where I'm at now, but do miss some of my bro's in the Bay Area CA.
Dave

Tom Quinn · Posted 29 Mar 2009 7:16 am

Thanks guys, it's good to know I'm not alone. I don't want to demonize the mando player, he obviously has a lot of inner turmoil.

For me it's wondering if I'll get into a band or backup situation that is both challenging and rewarding. I deeply understand that I'm 63. Most people peg me at my late 40s, early 50s except ivey who tells me I look 80, but what does he know? -L- I still carry the Bud and a Session 400 up to the stage in each hand.

Anyhow, life is too short to be angry or play in a lousy band. Good news? I fixed my plumbing -- the washer was backing up into the bathtub (!!!!!!!!!) withput having to dig up the lawn. A 50' snake and some dirty hands and I'm gonna take a shower right now! Thank you Lord! And also thank you Saint Larry, patron saint of home plumbing.

Kevin Hatton · From: Buffalo, N.Y.

I would have walked out also. I have found that alot of bar players, especially the younger ones are imature and have personality/ego problems. I only play special event shows now (Nashville openers and festivals) with the more pro musicians. These are the higher paying, more exposure jobs. I play alot less but have far more personal enjoyment. I just did a short stint with a national class jazz drummer. Just oustanding hand skills and dynamics on the drums. A real pro. I am trying to put together a classic country band now with more mature and seasoned players. I will not play with low life slugs for @##%%^ money.

Steve Feldman · From: Central MA USA

Ben Lawson · From: Brooksville Florida

I quit a band in the late '70's because I found out the other guys became pot heads. They hid it from me for a while but I eventually found out. They knew how oppossed to any drug use I was and still am.

Keith Hilton · From: 248 Laurel Road Ozark, Missouri 65721

Mike, wonder if the guy with the gun would of shot me because I married a Jewish girl. Her name before I married her was Beverly Shapiro.

Chris LeDrew · From: Canada

Man, if I had to walk out on a band evey time I saw drugs in the dressing room, I'd be after burning my gear long ago. Smile

Tom Quinn · Posted 29 Mar 2009 9:14 am

Been there did that... a lot. Makes you play great between your ears, but listen to the tape later and let me know... -L-

Mike Perlowin · From: Los Angeles CA

I don't like guns, but I think it's reasonable for somebody who runs a small retail business that deals in a lot of cash to have one, and I suspect the clubowner's gun was legal and he had all the necessary permits.

I also think the guy was probably "BS"ing about actually shooting Jews. Even so, I felt that the best thing to do was not make a fuss, play out the night and leave as fast as possible and never come back.

In all the intervening years I've never been back. I don't even know if the club still exists.
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Doug Beaumier · From: Northampton, MA

One time a drunk club owner pointed his gun at me and told me I better "see things his way". He was kidding around, but he was drunk, so that was pretty scary. Needless to say... I quit that gig!
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Tracy Sheehan · From: Fort Worth, Texas, USA

Hope i haven't told this before.Last time i played steel in a band was a few years ago.Played fiddle a couple of week ends later as i could move when they set thier amps up right behind me.
Any hoo,i was supposed to play steel on a Fri.and Sat night.On the Fri night the bass player (he had a bass) set his tall Kustom amp right behind mine and the guy with the guitar set his amp next to mine pointing at me and he never once shut that @$%^& fuzz tone off.I could not hear the singer.
I never went bACK.

Keith Hilton · From: 248 Laurel Road Ozark, Missouri 65721

Drinking "Tuning Fluid" can make anyone act irrational! Laughing

Bo Legg · Posted 29 Mar 2009 11:36 am

Tom Quinn, I say this with all sincerity. You are a true Steel player and I want to congratulate you and let you know you are truly one of my heroes.

I played in a band once where the PSG player walked off the job a lot. In fact we used to make bets on whether or not he would finish the show.

It seemed to me that walking out on a show was all Steel players’ Modus Operandi.

That guy really tweaked my interest in playing PSG. It was not his playing that impressed me but just his attitude.

I bought me a PSG and got after it. I too wanted become a PSG player which would instantly elevate my status in the band to the Exalted One. But most of all I just wanted to acquire that suave and debonair arrogant pric demeanor.

It all seemed to come much too easy for me. Laughing

Richard Sinkler · From: aka: Rusty Strings -- Missoula, Montana

I just went through something similar, twice. One band all killer musicians. but we all kissed and made up.

The second is a band that has a guitar player that is hard rock all the way. He says (and the other band mates) say he can play country as well. Well, I ain't heard none. He has a rule that I take the first half of a lead and he'll take the second. Well, I finish my half, and he's no where to be found. So, I have to scramble and pick up the slack in the middle of a lead. Later in the night he comes alive, but at twice the volume. Plus he walks all over me. The hard part of this all, is that the girl singer is great (it's her band and the guitar player is her room mate and will only play in this band with him), bass player is good (lot's of good ole country) and I play in other bands with both of them. There's 2 versions of this band. One where the girl is booked somewhere else and it becomes the bass players band. Then he hires me and my favorite local guitar player to play with (play in several bands with him), but won't play any more in the band with the girl and other guitar player. Luckily, the bass player understands my point and still hires me in his version of the band (he is the girl singer's boyfriend - she's my first ex-wife).

Advice for his love life: Learn to play that mandolin properly. One of the sweetest and sexiest instruments around.

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